The World is a Total Mess….

When I was younger, all I wanted to do was be an adult. I saw endless possibilities in the world. I wanted to go out and conquer it. I wanted to make it better.

When I would tell my mother about the trials and tribulations that I faced in my teens and 20s, she would tell me to enjoy life because these were “the best days of my life”. I didn’t believe her. Now years later, I realize that my mom was right. She was always right, but I didn’t realize it back then.

At 57, I have experienced a “been there, done that” kind of life. I feel like I have been through so much and seen so many things that I can relate to and understand most situations.

Of course, being an introvert, I keep most things to myself. It is better to not share too many details with the world. To just answer with a “fine” is much easier than having to explain everything to people.

I have two high school friends that no longer speak to each other because they disagreed about politics. I have a cousin who wants to marry her long-time boyfriend but she can’t because they are different religions.

I respect the decisions that people make, and I respect what they believe in. I have definite opinions on politics and religion. But I would rather not voice them because I would rather keep the peace with those people that matter to me.

I have lost several people to COVID-19. One was a man who showed great respect when he did work at the synagogue, knew his trade backwards and forwards, and was quiet, kind and unassuming. He told his boss that he was afraid of COVID and would stay home as he knew he would die if he contracted it. He contracted the virus, and he died.

Another person who lost a battle with the virus was someone that I dated for several years WAY back in the 80s. We didn’t stay in touch, but his older brother told me the news. Who would expect that a healthy 57 year old runner would die?? Not me, but then again this virus does not discriminate.

A friend of mine in England had the virus back in March. She thankfully survived, but she was very sick. This virus has changed her life in many ways.

The world has gone mad. Riots. Protests. Racism. A Presidential election that has completely divided the country. Hate. Pettiness. A virus some fear yet others believe is a hoax. Murder. Fires that are raging out of control.

And you all wonder why I always say I am not a fan of people! I like my bubble. I take comfort in my little section of the world that is filled with my closest friends and family.

Every day it gets easier for me to introvert. I keep myself occupied by doing things that make me happy. In a way, I miss the “lockdown” that we had earlier in the year. I had an excuse for not going out in this crazy world. No one thought twice when I didn’t attend an event or when I had groceries delivered. Honestly I do not care what others think. If you like me, that is great. If you don’t like me, that’s fine too.

I am happy. My small spot in the world is my safe place. My boyfriend makes me happy. My dogs make me happy. Life is good. Now go away!