Home > Bereavement and Grief, Death be not proud, Life as a Widow, Loss of a spouse, Love never dies > A doormat, a funeral, and sinusitis! Oh my!

A doormat, a funeral, and sinusitis! Oh my!

i am not a doormatI am not a doormat! My sole purpose in this world is not for other’s to walk all over me! Having said that, I did not attend my mother-in-law’s funeral today. I have taken all the disrespect from Mark’s family that I intend to take.

As I posted a few days ago, I sent the father-in-law and brother-in-law an Edible Arrangement with a helium mylar balloon that said “Thinking of you” and a personalized card sending my condolences. Well, that arrangement was delivered on Saturday. Never once did either of them call me to say thank you or even acknowledge that they received it. I didn’t really expect them to acknowledge it because neither of them has bothered to contact me since Mark died 9-1/2 weeks ago. They actually made my decision to not attend today’s funeral quite easy. It is apparent that they prefer to not to include me in the family.

I don’t go where I’m not welcome, and I don’t stay where I’m not wanted!!

There is only one person who I still really care about and that is Mark’s niece (his brother’s youngest daughter). She’s really been the only one in the family (besides my mother-in-law) who bothered to keep in touch with me. She was the first of the two nieces to tell me of my mother-in-law’s passing. She was also the one who told me of the funeral arrangements and the one who attended Mark’s memorial service (with her father and mother). I know she didn’t like being put in the middle (having to tell me that I was not included in the limo ride or “invited” to attend the burial), but she dealt with it the best way that she could. She was always my favorite niece, but even still, I just couldn’t go to the funeral even for her.

sinucleanse_netipotAnd with that, I still have my sinusitis! It’s been 9-1/2 weeks. I have been to the doctor’s office on more than one occasion. I’ve tried a plethora of medications such as decongestants, antihistamines, nasal sprays, cough medications, saline washes using the neti pot, Ginger/Lemon/Honey tea, humidification, vaporizer using Vick’s, Vick’s alone (that smell reminds me of growing up because my mom and dad swore by that stuff!), and lots of sleep. So far nothing has worked. My last visit to the doctor gave me a round of antibiotics going on the theory that the bacteria is localized (in my sinus cavity not in my blood stream). After six days, I have seen no improvement, but I have seen a change in my symptoms. Instead of hoarseness and a mucus ball in the back of my throat that would choke me, I now have a stuffy nose with blood tinged mucus, a cough caused by the dripping of mucus down the back of my throat , and a “nasal hazel” voice.

This morning I’d had enough, and I called the doctor’s office to report the new symptoms. The doctor said that the antibiotic should have kicked in substantially by now (6-1/2 full days). He felt that even though my symptoms changed (which he felt could be due to an improvement that was making things looser), he switched my antibiotic to something stronger. He said if there is bacteria in my sinuses, this new medication would clear it up. If this medication does not help, I am to call him back and he would reevaluate. Oh yay!! Boy, do I miss my $5.00 doctor visit co-pay, and my $5.00co-pay for a generic medication!! At least I still have my Flexible Saving Account, although I am going through that much quicker than I ever expected.

Oh, and if my some chance the family should call me and attempt to give me grief, the BLOCK NUMBER feature will be turned on quicker than you can say, “BITE ME!”

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